It is a gloomy
day in London. Sometime weather plays up with my mood and I get very emotional.
N-my daughter did not want to go to her childminder’s this morning. She was
busy playing with Pritha (a family friend) and I was getting late. At the same
time I understood her not wanting to go at all: she hardly gets any one at home
other than us. It is a lonely country. Again her friends are her only family
beyond us I guess. Like yesterday she could not wait to go -she wanted to show
off her sunglasses to Eva. I feel sad for my daughter sometime- leaving her
alone, all day. Her staying away from me for so long in the day adds to the
gloominess of my heart. Not always but some days-Today.
I get into the
train after dropping N. Mind it once she reached the door, she was kin to go in
and then didn’t look back to say me bye or wait for me to kiss her. It breaks
my heart! She is already leaving the nest.
I get into the
train with mix feeling. Gloominess, anticipated tiredness of 2 hour journey and
the suffocation from overcrowding in train- I try to avoid everything and close
my eye. I do that every day (my friend Archi thinks that I do not get to meet
any handsome man to flirt on the train as I close my eyes. And that I should
not do that. I keep that in mind always and promise to look around. So far
badly unsuccessful in keeping my eyes open though)
I almost sleep
walk through my station to train to Euston to Victoria line platform. I get to
seat! Yes, I did get a seat. And I close my eyes again. When I open I see this
face of a child on the billboard tears rolling down, and oxygen pipe from nose-staring
at me, directly. It is an ad for an organisation appealing for donation for
preventing childhood cancer. I could not hold myself. I tried to look away,
tried to not think about it but all I can do is stare at the child. Almost
ready to cry. I feel the pain in my heart, almost breathless. The feeling- I
cannot express what it was- mixture of helplessness, pain-for the child and all
children and the parents who has to go through so much of hardship every day. It
is not just diseases but water, winter, snow, war, food, abuse, homelessness
and abandonment and what not our children endure. Yes our children- I fail to
differentiate my child with others. Do not know how I will react in reality but
for now in my heart I cannot. I embrace my baby my N in my mind -no child or
parents should ever have to go through
such pain.
And then
suddenly my mind goes off to mother’s day. And I think about my mother and
think about calling her. Maybe I never give her enough credit for what she has
contributed to my life. And then I think about me. As a mother I have become a
better person. I will give that to myself. I was never a bad person. I have
always been generous and a giver. Yes I like me. But motherhood also made me patience,
rational, calm, tolerant and open as a person. I am able to look outside and
see the beauty in every small thing around like a Lego house which reaches till
sky, pink cloud, time out to the birdy for not listening to come to the balcony
for breakfast or the mama cat and daddy dog family whose child is a pig!
And I smile and
I look up to see a good looking man staring at me -smiling. Nah…. I lied! It
would be too dramatic for my standard too (Archi, I can see her rolling eyes
reading this and of course those moral police might think of me as such a character)
I smile and look
up to see that I reached Brixton. Well the alternative is not too bad actually.
I do not feel that gloomy anymore.
Mother’s day is
on Sunday in this part of world. I love
these days of celebration as long as they do not involve spending huge amount
on gifts. But just a tiny bit of
pampering doesn’t hurt, doesn’t it.
Happy mother’s
day to every one: to a mother, all those who feel like a mother and those who
doesn’t. I will celebrate the day and will make some cake for myself. I always
call my ma, almost every day. But will of course call her on Sunday –she loves
all these special days. I like what makes her happy.
I know many of
you will like to celebrate the day with your mother and your child’s mother or
anyone actually. Hence an easy and Laid-back recipe for the day so that you can
you easily cook up something special to go with a cuppa without really spending
a lot of time in kitchen.
Recipe for chicken Pakora
Ingredients
500 Boneless chickens, I used chicken
thighs
2 finely chopped red onion (large)
Finely chopped green chillies (as per your
taste)
1/2 teaspoon garam masala powder
1 tablespoon ginger paste
1 tablespoon garlic paste
1 tablespoon lime juice
1 tablespoon finely chopped cilantro
1 teaspoon Chaat masala
2 tablespoon gram flour (Besan, use more if
you feel that the pakora mix is not binding well. Binding will depend on
hydration level of the mixture)
Salt to taste
Oil to deep fry
Method:
1. Mix all the ingredients together except
the oil with chicken.
2. Heat oil and deep fry on medium heat.
The colour should be a light golden brown.
3. Serve hot.
Tips: you can fry a few to check for level
of salt and spice and add more salt/ spice/chilli depending on your taste
